Divorce can be a crushing blow or it can be very liberating depending on how the separation has come about and how it’s made you feel. Finishing a marriage causes many challenges but it can also bring with it lots of positive changes. One of the issues to deal with is your new status as someone who is single. How do you view yourself once the marriage is over?
Whether ending the marriage was a mutual decision or it ended badly, you will have given a lot of time and effort into that relationship. After separating your life will obviously be different, there may be changes in the way that friends and family deal with you. Some people may even disapprove of your decision and if children are in the mix it can bring with it many extra emotions.
This will be a time where you’ll need to adjust slowly. It will feel strange to do things alone that you did as a couple. Going out with married friends or for a meal with another couple may feel odd. You might even find your friends start to set up dates for you, make sure to take it all in your stride!
Being married to someone makes you a part of that person but not any more, now you’re just you! This can be both a good and bad thing but it’s a good time to grow into your new self. Take a good look at yourself, now is the time to figure out who you are. That can be scary, but remember that you are more than someone’s other half. You are a unique individual.
Ask yourself if you lost part of yourself in that old marriage, did you stop doing things you enjoyed? Did you tone down a strong willed attitude in order to keep the peace and seem more agreeable? Maybe it’s time to get those hobbies and qualities back into your life.
You might even want to start afresh, reinvent yourself maybe! Try new things, start classes in things you’ve been too shy to do before, this will not only help you to become a “new you” but you’ll also likely meet new people as well.
Being alone doesn’t mean you have to be lonely! Remember now you can put yourself first, you don’t have to plan around the other person in your life. It may be as simple as being able to eat when you want, go out when you want, see who you want, you’re the one in charge now!
By being alone you have the ability to empower yourself. Perhaps your spouse held you back from truly caring for yourself. He or she may have enabled you to become dependent rather than be an equal partner.
Many newly divorced people have trouble doing anything alone, even going to the cinema or for a meal alone. Try getting away from your comfort zone. It will show you how powerful you are! You are no longer defined or limited by a marriage that doesn’t work. While there are many changes along the way, you are on the road to understanding yourself. Embrace the journey ahead and make sure to contact one of our readers to see what your future can bring!