This article gives you some guidance and secrets on how to gain real self-confidence. To be self-confident means that you have the mental ability to trust yourself and your choices, to be able to rely on yourself and be assured that what you do and what you have planned is good. It’s also the ability to cope with feeling uncomfortable and dealing with the unknown. The opposite of self-confidence is low self-esteem, this is where you lack the abilities mentioned before, and can make people very shy or timid, unable to speak up. A lack of self-esteem can put a block on you getting what you want from life or from feeling comfortable.
What is True Self-Confidence?
When the term “true self-confidence” is used, I’m not just referring to what is mentioned above, but in addition you have to have a “whatever it takes” outlook on life. This is like promising yourself that you will do all you can to achieve your goals and ambitions, even if that means making compromises or waiting longer than you may have anticipated in the beginning.
How to Improve Your Self-Esteem
Considering that we’re not born with a high sense of self-esteem or self-confidence, it’s obvious that it’s something we have to work towards and achieve for ourselves. The problem with this is that society gets in the way. You may feel under scrutiny for the way you look, the way you act, the way you talk and more. The more you worry about your actions the lower your self-esteem can fall. Therefore, it’s possible for you to change your levels of confidence and feel more positive about yourself. Here’s some tips on how to achieve that:
- Be Patient
Know that it’s going to take time to build up your self-confidence, it’s not going to happen overnight or even in a week or a month. It will take you a good while and you’ll be learning all the way through this journey to a greater self-confidence.
Not the kind you might do for the tax office! This is where you look at yourself, note down all the things and characteristics you like about yourself. These can be skills, knowledge, achievements, looks, abilities, anything! Keep going until you literally can’t think of any more and you’ll be surprised how long the list is.
Next think about what other skills, attributes and abilities you would like to have or change. Then set goals towards how you can achieve them, this may be in the form of learning, developing a habit, doing an activity more or for the first time. You can then add to the list and see your confidence grow.
- Form Good Habits
Make sure to be:
Independent: This doesn’t mean being alone, it means that you don’t have to be part of the “in-crowd”. Be an individual, don’t worry what someone else thinks of your dress or your shoes, be comfortable with who you are.
Non-judgemental: Consider the fact that you don’t make wild or negative assumptions about most people, so know that others aren’t really doing it to you either. Also make sure not to judge yourself or criticise yourself unnecessarily.
Organised: The more organised you are, the more you can focus on yourself and how you feel, not being flustered means you can hold that important conversation without planning the rest of your day in the back of your mind.
- Be Pro-Active
Don’t be reactive to other people, even those who may make unfair comments, detach from them and focus on yourself. By making your own choices and decisions based on your own thoughts and desires you will boost your self-confidence more than ever.
- Positivity Rules
The moment you start to have a negative thought, feeling or sensation then turn to a time when you felt confident. By linking this negative moment to a very positive, confidence boosting time you will get yourself back on track.
Of course if you’re wanting to know how to get started to boosting your self-esteem or gaining true self-confidence then our readers and always willing to point you in the right direction. If you feeling something is holding you back then you can always get advice now to help your self-confidence grow.