Author: martin

This article gives you some guidance and secrets on how to gain real self-confidence. To be self-confident means that you have the mental ability to trust yourself and your choices, to be able to rely on yourself and be assured that what you do and what you have planned is good. It’s also the ability to cope with feeling uncomfortable and dealing with the unknown. The opposite of self-confidence is low self-esteem, this is where you lack the abilities mentioned before, and can make people very shy or timid, unable to speak up. A lack of self-esteem can put a block on you getting what you want from life or from feeling comfortable.

What is True Self-Confidence?

When the term “true self-confidence” is used, I’m not just referring to what is mentioned above, but in addition you have to have a “whatever it takes” outlook on life. This is like promising yourself that you will do all you can to achieve your goals and ambitions, even if that means making compromises or waiting longer than you may have anticipated in the beginning.

How to Improve Your Self-Esteem

Considering that we’re not born with a high sense of self-esteem or self-confidence, it’s obvious that it’s something we have to work towards and achieve for ourselves. The problem with this is that society gets in the way. You may feel under scrutiny for the way you look, the way you act, the way you talk and more. The more you worry about your actions the lower your self-esteem can fall. Therefore, it’s possible for you to change your levels of confidence and feel more positive about yourself. Here’s some tips on how to achieve that:

• Be Patient

Know that it’s going to take time to build up your self-confidence, it’s not going to happen overnight or even in a week or a month. It will take you a good while and you’ll be learning all the way through this journey to a greater self-confidence.

• Self-Assessment

Not the kind you might do for the tax office! This is where you look at yourself, note down all the things and characteristics you like about yourself. These can be skills, knowledge, achievements, looks, abilities, anything! Keep going until you literally can’t think of any more and you’ll be surprised how long the list is.

Next think about what other skills, attributes and abilities you would like to have or change. Then set goals towards how you can achieve them, this may be in the form of learning, developing a habit, doing an activity more or for the first time. You can then add to the list and see your confidence grow.

• Form Good Habits

Make sure to be:

Independent: This doesn’t mean being alone, it means that you don’t have to be part of the “in-crowd”. Be an individual, don’t worry what someone else thinks of your dress or your shoes, be comfortable with who you are.

Non-judgemental: Consider the fact that you don’t make wild or negative assumptions about most people, so know that others aren’t really doing it to you either. Also make sure not to judge yourself or criticise yourself unnecessarily.

Organised: The more organised you are, the more you can focus on yourself and how you feel, not being flustered means you can hold that important conversation without planning the rest of your day in the back of your mind.

• Be Pro-Active

Don’t be reactive to other people, even those who may make unfair comments, detach from them and focus on yourself. By making your own choices and decisions based on your own thoughts and desires you will boost your self-confidence more than ever.

• Positivity Rules

The moment you start to have a negative thought, feeling or sensation then turn to a time when you felt confident. By linking this negative moment to a very positive, confidence boosting time you will get yourself back on track.

Of course if you’re wanting to know how to get started to boosting your self-esteem or gaining true self-confidence then our readers and always willing to point you in the right direction. If you feeling something is holding you back then you can always get advice now to help your self-confidence grow.

Being motivated is the first step to being able to learn and achieve as much as you possibly can in life but especially when it comes to studying. This may be in an academic sense but also in the workplace. As many are back to school, college and university this month then this article can be of help to you or those you know who are going through this time of change such as friends or children.

Setting Goals

By giving yourself a goal you will have something to aim towards and as such this can peak your motivation. Imagine being told to run a race where you have no clue where the finish line is, you wouldn’t even want to start, there would be no point! These goals can be long or short term, can focus on the next few months or your long term career aspirations. Write down your goals, be precise in what you want, visualise yourself achieving your goal, all these things can help you stay focused.

Just Do It

A well-known marketing phrase and one used by many motivational speakers (Shia LaBeouf anyone?), however it’s one that many should listen to. Instead of sitting there and worrying about how you have so much to do or that you’re not focusing as much as you should then just get on with it. Stop playing the victim and get started, once you start you’ll realise that you’ll get stuck in and time will pass you by a lot faster than you realise.

Some ways of getting started are just telling yourself you will study for 15 minutes, by the time you get to 15 minutes you’ll find yourself nicely focused and able to carry on, or have a break and do another 15 minutes. If you feel tired then take a brisk walk, a shower or do a few jumping jacks, all these things can get your mind and body more alert. Avoid distractions, turn off the TV and put your phone on silent.

Genuine Interest

Very often when we’re given topics to study we can automatically see it as a chore, something we’re not interested in and are only learning about because someone told us to. This in turn can make you feel like giving up the moment you think about it and making studying a lot more laborious. Instead of viewing it this way why not try to find out more interesting aspects of the topic, look for articles and books on the subject that link it to something you like. Talk to other people either in real life or on forums to see what passion can be shared about the subject.

Be Positive

Easier said than done sometimes when things seem hard and deadlines are looming but by changing your entire mindset over your school, college or university you can help stay more positive. Instead of looking at school as somewhere where teachers boss you around considering it a stepping stone into adulthood, a place where you will grow and mature into someone great, a place where you can make wonderful friendships and learn social skills. For college and university, instead of seeing it as a place of anxiety and deadlines, see it as somewhere that can set you up for a very promising career, a place where you can be seen to excel in subjects you are good at and that are important to you.

Taking all these matters on-board can help you and your loved ones to realise that studying doesn’t have to be mundane or a chore, they have a longer term goal, once you see it you will focus so much more.

Being told to listen to your heart is an often given and meaningful piece of advice to give or be given. But what does it mean? This article will give you some guidance on what it means and how to do it. However, it’s wise to know the basics of this advice. What does it really mean when people are telling you to follow where your heart leads? After all, the heart is just an organ isn’t it? It can’t think and isn’t responsible for your actions right? That may not be true so read on!

What Does it Mean?

Ancient philosophers used to think that the heart was the seat of emotions, thought, passion and reason. So back in those times if someone was told to listen to their heart it meant that they should listen to how they feel, their instinct even instead of going by sheer logic alone. Some think to listen to the heart is to act in a primitive or overly sensitive manner but this isn’t true.

It’s always a good thing to know and especially to teach others, including children, that logic and strict question and answer isn’t how the world works. There’s always going to be grey areas, times where you can’t just sit on one side of the fence or the other. This is where you need to listen to your heart, to stop and think about your emotions, your needs and desires. It may seem an unusual path to take or it may feel like you’re not being rational but when we use our instinct we often make great pathways and have wonderful ideas.

Why Intuition Matters

The mind is a wonderful thing, it can create life, art, poetry, and it can love others and do all manner of good. However with this comes emotions, things that can hold you back, fear, hesitation, drama, complications and more. This can lead to your mind being blocked and the true feelings and ideas you are having become masked and hidden away. Therefore it’s very easy to take the logical and rational route to feel safe and like you’re making a sensible decision. But this might not be the right one to take, there are better options in your mind waiting to be unleashed.

The more you stop and think, the more you see past these blockages and start believing in your own mind and own decisions the easier it will become. It’s like working a muscle, the more you flex it the stronger it becomes, the same is true of intuition and this is why it matters to use it. You will gain wisdom far greater than only making logical decisions. You’ll learn more and understand how your heart can guide you.

How to Listen to Your Heart

Whilst it would be nice, messages from the heart do not get delivered gift wrapped with a bow to your door or get announced by a fan fare. More likely it’s going to feel like you’ve had a really good idea, one that you can’t stop thinking about, like it’s rooted within you. It often comes to you very quickly so at times it will be dismissed just as fast but you’ll learn to hang onto it. Another way your heart and intuition can come to you is when you have a deep seated feeling that something is the right thing to do. You may feel warm, an urgent need to contact someone, your stomach may tie in a knot and other feelings may occur.

Here’s some simple tips to help you:

1. Learn how to quieten down your logical mind

There’s a few ways of doing this, you can use visualisation techniques, you can repeat an affirmation in your head or out loud or even a simple chant.

2. Meditate

This is an obvious but important step, the best way to do this is routinely. For 10 to 15 minutes each day find a quiet place and sit in a comfortable position. Focus on your breathing and feel the air enter and leave your body, feel out for the sense of calm that will come to you. Enjoy this inner peace and serenity, the quietness that you have created, that is within you. If a thought comes to mind then contemplate it, see where it takes you, if a scenario starts then let it unfold, see where it can take you. All of this will heighten your intuition.

3. Trust Your Intuition

This state of knowing something is right without exactly knowing why is how intuition is often explained. Also known as a “gut feeling” it’s important to know that these aren’t guesses or hunches, they come from you, from your heart for a reason. Consider how different a situation may turn out if you used straight logic instead. It probably wouldn’t have gone the way you wanted it to.

4. Be Creative

Delving into creative mediums can really help to open your mind and leave logic behind. Creativity is little to do with intellect and rationality so it can really come from the heart and assist in your intuitive powers.

5. Ask Questions

Not to other people as such but out to the universe, you’ll be surprised how often you may be answered. It might not be instant but you’ll get the answer one way or another, maybe even keep a diary of your questions and look at it at the end of each day, seeing if you can think back to ways they may have been answered. You’ll find that the more you do this, the more the correct answer will come to you in a flash, and it’s just a case of ignoring the logical part of you that dismisses or doubts your initial answer.

All of our readers have strong natural intuition that they develop every day, this is why we’re proud to have them here at Sundial Psychics so if you’re needing guidance just get in touch.

We hear these words mentioned a lot whether it’s in general conversation, hearing about them on TV or even in the name of film titles. But what really is the supernatural or paranormal? By definition a supernatural or paranormal event is something that happens which defies logic or explanation. It’s something science cannot explain fully. There are several different kinds of paranormal phenomena, here we’re going to look into some of them.

Ghosts

This is the number one talked about paranormal entity, many are asked if they’ve seen a ghost, some explain they have seen one or even several. Many of us wonder what happens after we pass away, if we’d be able to communicate afterwards. Many people think so and some really hope and want for it to be true. Whether you believe it or not there’s plenty of people out there who have said they’ve had a run in with a ghost or at least seen one from a distance.

While many think that ghosts are people who have passed on or those who are stuck in some way, some think they are a spirit, sometimes evil but not always. Some even think they are elemental and are not human or humanoid at all. Most parapsychology theories state that ghosts are embodiments of energy able to communicate though extra sensory perception. This can be done via clairvoyance, clairaudience and clairsentience. It is thought they aren’t necessarily just those who are dead but can convey the energy and consciousness of anyone.

The Haunted House

Also known as “hauntings” this phenomenon is location based, they don’t just involve ghosts, they can attract other supernatural beings. They are usually categorised as one of three types. Residual where the same thing keeps happening over and over, usually at the same point and time of day. Poltergeist activity, this is where objects move around, doors open and close and general chaos can be caused. Finally there is intelligent hauntings, this is where a spirit tries in various ways to interact with humans.

Poltergeist hauntings are the ones people are usually scared of the most, but strangely enough many people say that they are not caused by evil entities or ghosts. Rather, they are caused by the living. It’s thought that this activity is a form of psycho-kinetic energy created by someone who is either deluded, very stressed, angry or suffering some other kind of strong and usually negative emotion, very often the person is unaware of what they are doing.

Demons

Again this is something we’re scared of, demons are seen to be devil like, in the pursuit of evil at all times. Those are believe in the paranormal are often split on whether demons actually exist. They believe that what perceive to be a demon is a very angry or distressed ghost, it could also be that it’s a ghost of someone who was literally a very bad person when alive.

Cryptozoology, Myths and Legends

Cryptozoologyis the study of paranormal animal activity. These would include things like Bigfoot/Yeti and roaming skunk ape creatures as well as the Loch Ness Monster and Chupacabra. There’s also many myths and legends that are categorised in the supernatural such as werewolves, vampires, mothmen, zombies and more.

Metaphysical

These are concepts that although science can explain to an extent sometimes, they still remain largely unknown. For example:

• Clairvoyance/ESP: This is where someone has the ability to see future events and sense things beyond the usual five senses.
• Reincarnation: The belief that life is cyclical, once we die, we are reborn as another living being.
• Telekenisis and telepathy: The ability to move things with the mind and the ability to send thoughts silently to others.
• Auras: Coloured energy fields that radiate from the body, many say each colour has a different meaning.
• Chakras: Energy portals along the body that relate to specific parts of the body, mind and soul as well as the world around us.

As you can see, there are many different branches when it comes to the paranormal and supernatural. Just because they cannot be fully explained by science, it doesn’t mean that they don’t exist or that they don’t matter or cannot be a part of your life. Believe in what you want to believe and make sure you also believe very deeply in yourself.

 

Many people ask me how to stop from feeling like they are drifting away from their beliefs. This doesn’t just have to mean religious ones and to be honest, it’s often not the religious ones that people have trouble with, but it is spiritual feelings that can make you feel frustrated or like your progress is being hampered.

First of all it’s best to work out what’s really bothering you, look at day to day life. Have things become more stressful, is your job getting harder, are people around you being more demanding? If you can identify a problem then you are half way there to getting it sorted. But what about when nothing in-particular is going on, what if everything is fine? This is when it’s likely to be your spiritual balance has shifted.

The feelings people have are often linked to phrases such as:

• “I’ve lost my way”
• “I feel like I’m looking through fog”
• “No one understands/listens to me”
• “I feel like life is passing me by”

It can also be accompanied with a general feeling of being unwell, like having cold symptoms or feeling agitated and maybe not sleeping as well as you normally do. The good thing is that all these things are perfectly normal. These kinds of feelings may well be coming to a peak at the moment as the planets are aligned in a way that creates a lot of unusual and erratic energy.

NASA this week is hoping to get some amazing photos of Pluto, the once forgotten planet is now coming back in favour. Isn’t that sometimes familiar of life? You may feel insignificant until someone really wants you for something, then you come back into favour. Make sure then not to let people take advantage of you. As for the feelings of being unbalanced, August will see a lot of this settle down.

In the meantime and if you ever feel unsettled you can try some of these tips:

Meditate: I can already hear the chorus of “I don’t have time!” You DO have time, meditation can simply be a 3 minute contemplation in the shower, if you do that 5 times a week and then two 20 minute sessions at the weekend you will have amassed a blissful hour of meditation a week! When you meditate be aware of yourself, how you connect with the planet, other people and your surroundings, know how to plan and make changes if you need to.

Remember That We Live in Extraordinary Times: Modern day life is very fast paced, think of technology just five or ten years ago. It’s vastly different to how it is now, think even further back and you’ll be surprised how much has really changed. Along with this quick way of life we can lose track of friendships and love we have for one another. Contact an old friend, speak to a family member who may be alone, turn your phone off at unimportant times. See how it makes you feel! Much calmer I suspect!

Trust the Universe: This may sounds a bit odd but know that although there are times that things feel off centre, it’s often for a reason and it’s not always going to stay that way. You know there’s always light at the end of the tunnel and decisions you can make once you go through it.

Stay Centred: Think back to the meditation, how it made you feel calm, how you felt in control. If you’re having a day where everything is getting on top of you then know you have that calm and strong place you can go to whenever you want!

If you still feel that you’ve lost your way then our phone, online and SMS readers are just a short call of message away to help you.

Love and Light!

 

Last week was Carers Week in the UK. A carer is someone who provides care above and beyond a usual relationship. This may be in helping someone to do simple things like reminding them to take medication to planning and their entire day for them or being with them every moment of the day. Whatever level of care provided it can be a strain and we have to ask “Who cares for the carers?” This is a very valid question and it also brings up the very important subject of Self-Care.

What is Self-Care?

Self-care is in basic terms looking after yourself, showering, eating, brushing your teeth etc. But there is a higher level of self-care that can really help you in life. This type of action towards your own life isn’t just for those who may be weak or struggling, it’s a great pathway for those who are also strong and ambitious to get what they want from life.

Self-care can empower you, if you have or face problems in life and are able to tackle them confidently and head on then you’ll feel good about yourself, while also solving a problem. Not only will you have created a positive change in your life but you’ll benefit from that confidence boost that you gain along with it.

Different Kinds of Self-Care

Self-care comes in many different forms, as above it can be as simple as looking after your body by cleaning and feeding it. However, self-care goes a lot deeper than that. It can include educating yourself on maintaining a healthy lifestyle through fitness and a balanced diet. Taking courses to empower yourself on things like mindfulness or first aid. Consulting spiritual advisors like having a psychic phone reading or a love reading.

Approaches to self-care include things like quitting smoking, alternative medicine, stress and pain management and using apps or online tools to gain insight into your life. We even have an online and text reading service for just this kind of thing.

Steps for Self Care

Here are some ways that you can really gain and benefit from self-care in simply easy steps:

 

1. Be kind to yourself
2. Say exactly what you mean
3. If it feels wrong then do not do it
4. Don’t be afraid to say yes or no
5. Trust your instincts
6. Don’t be a people pleaser
7. Don’t speak bad about yourself
8. Let go of what you can’t control
9. Walk away from drama and negativity
10. Gain support and insight when you feel you need it

These are small but very enlightening ways of achieving self-care on a deep level. Trusting yourself and speaking your mind is so much more important than you may realise. Also while it may feel nice to gain the attention or likes of those around you, don’t fool yourself, pleasing people is good but don’t say things just to please them, please yourself first! If they don’t like it then they weren’t your friend in the first place.

Number 10 is a very important one, while we are good at looking after ourselves, we also must know when it’s good to get opinions or the insight of someone else in order to work out where we’re going and how to get there. It may be a case of lost love, wanting to know how an ex feels or even just wondering what lies ahead for you.

Contacting a Sundial reader will assist you greatly with Number 10 and you’ll be able to place these other steps into your life with a clearer view of what is coming to you in either your love or career life reading.

Connecting to nature isn’t just about going outside and getting some fresh air or talking a stroll along the beach. It’s more about thinking about ourselves and our wider human and ecological relationships. By having a stronger and fuller connection with nature you can experience things in ways that you don’t currently do so. When you experience things differently you start to think differently and this help you change a lot of things in your life and enhance positive experiences.

Nature offers much more to us than we can imagine, patterns and colours, creatures we are familiar with and those who seem almost alien. The textures and forms of the planet appeal directly to the deepest aspects of your human consciousness and sub consciousness. At the end of the day you must realise that we are part of this nature that is around us. There is no real difference and so we must learnt to connect and be a part of it. Standing on the outside looking in can be nice but it doesn’t immerse us and help us to become more spiritual and fulfilled with life.

A powerful and close relationship with the environment is built into the human psyche. When you look at history, nature, mountains, rivers, trees, the sun, the moon have always been honoured and looked up to as symbols that are meaningful and important. By moving away from our connection to nature and ourselves we have begun polluting and destroying the environment. We need to bring back the attitudes of the past to strengthen our connection with nature once more. However it is best to start on a personal level and see what changes you can make in your own life and then share with others.

For this kind of connection to happen, human consciousness must rise above greed and exploitation, something I am sure many of you avoid as much as possible! If you can take time to see the nature deep within you, your skills and talents and what you can do for yourself and others you’ll start to see it everywhere.  This provides the key to this vital relationship with yourself, with others and with your environment. This connection with nature and the deeper, stronger connection with yourself removes negative emotions, elevates your spiritual consciousness and creates a desire to care for the whole planet.

If you’re unsure where to start then here’s some tips:

Music/Dance – rhythm, moving around, feeling emotions from lyrics are all things that can make you open your mind.

Get out into nature – go outside, go to places you’ve never been before, really look at what’s around you, even take photos and look at them later. Take in the sounds, smells and colours.

Moderate exercise – light exercise always heightens awareness of self and makes you feel good. Make sure you do something you like otherwise you’ll associate negativity to it.

Balanced diet – getting vital nutrition helps to keep the body and mind in balance.

Yoga – this is a wonderful way to breathe, think and connect with your own body and understand what it can do.

Meditation – a wonderful way to relax but also to connect with your inner self and maybe even with your spirit guides.

Always be thankful for mother earth, take off your shoes and walk on the grass, feel her under your feet and be forever grateful. Help the planet, help your friends and always help and look after yourself.

It is seen by many as a milestone in a relationship, laden with all kinds of meanings and promises but those 3 words can mean a lot or nothing at all. Some find it very hard to share them whilst others can hand out the gesture with ease and on multiple occasions.

Why Do We Say It?

Many things to do with love, romance and relationships go back to very old customs and traditions but saying ‘I love you’ is actually a relatively new thing. In the UK it only really started to get said with strong meaning in relationships in the 1960’s. The era brought with it a wave of feminism and equality along with strong opinion on free love and expression. People started to share their feelings more openly and thus saying those 3 words became all important as time went on.

It Doesn’t Always Mean What We Think

Love means something different to everyone, I am pretty sure that’s well known. However, when we look at the word love in detail it’s even more complex than we can give it credit for. In Sanskrit there’s almost 100 different words to describe love so it’s no surprise that we often aren’t sure what it means to other people.

This is why saying ‘I love You’ may be nice but it’s also confusing and even seen as a blanket statement. There also has to be context as well, if someone is telling you they love you when you do things for them and not at other times then you have to wonder, do they like you or just the things you bring to them? It’s not always bad though, most of the time the phrase is used to show a step up, a level of commitment and trust has started to form.

Don’t Worry If It’s Not Being Said

Just as hearing or saying ‘I love you’ can be a wonderful thing, the lack of it between you and your partner doesn’t mean that love isn’t there. Studies have shown that a good relationship doesn’t hinge on this being said to one another on a regular basis so you have nothing to worry about. That said, if you are worried then make sure you speak to your partner openly about what love means to you and what it means to them.

More studies show that the longer you’re in a relationship the less frequently you are to say it to one another. Again this doesn’t mean the love is fading but more that the need or desire to say it just isn’t as strong anymore. This is very likely because love is being shown in many different ways and mainly by the length of time you have been with one another.

How To Know if Someone Loves You

If you’re waiting for someone to say ‘I love you’ first then you may be wondering if the love is there at all. Remember to look at other aspects of the relationship, trust, commitment, sharing, kindness, attentiveness are all aspects of a loving relationship so it doesn’t have to be said. If you’re wanting to hear it though, it may be best to take the plunge and initiate it by saying it yourself. Do not be disheartened if your partner doesn’t say it back right away though! Some people just need time.

If you’re wondering about who may love you or what may happen if you say ‘I love you’ to someone else, get in touch with one of our specialist love readers and they will enlighten you!

We’ve heard it all said. Someone is “seeking attention”, “why can’t they just keep quiet and not make a fuss?”, “she’s such a drama queen!” and so on. But is it really bad to seek attention? You could say that any time we speak or communicate we are asking someone to pay attention to us, isn’t that the same thing?

Ignorance Isn’t Always Bliss

Studies have shown that being ignored can be just as harmful, if not more harmful than being bullied. It may sound strange but think about it, if someone has something hurtful said about or to them then at least someone is thinking of them! Even an argument between friends is still interaction of some kind.

This kind of finding has been mentioned by philosophers but more in depth studies from psychologists and neurologists show that we would rather have some form of interaction with someone than be ignored by everyone. Our lack of understanding how and why we need this attention can be problematic such as calling people attention seekers when they may just be lonely or proud of their actions.

It’s Not a Character Flaw

Our failure to realise that this behaviour is normal can land us in trouble sometimes, this is when people can end up in relationships just for the sake of someone paying attention to them, even if it’s negative or damaging. Many of us want to shout out about what we did well or something we achieved that day but worry that others will see it as seeking validation or boasting, or again as seeking attention.

Many times on social media people complain that so-and-so is going on again about the goals they met at the gym or the meal they made. The fact is that the person they’re complaining about is proud of their accomplishments and isn’t afraid to let others know about it. This isn’t ever a bad thing, we encourage children to be proud of the things they make and the progress they make in school and in life. Why as adults do we scold one another for it?

Think of the Bigger Picture

As well as people being proud rather than bragging you can also see people saying things like they’re fed up, they’ve had a bad day, they are tired of their job. This negativity again can be seen as attention seeking “he just wants us to ask what’s wrong” or “she’s always complaining”. What’s worse is when you ask these people what’s wrong they may brush you off. This often labels them as an attention seeker and people go on to ignore them, something that as we now know can be very painful and upsetting.

People like the ones mentioned above are often reaching out for help but don’t know how to do so in a direct way. This doesn’t make them a bad person, maybe they just want their mind taken off it, a hug, a compliment, a friend to let them know if they want to talk, then they will be there for them.

So if you’re ever called an attention seeker or feel yourself about to call someone one, then try thinking a little deeper. It’s not a bad thing and it often means something else is going on underneath the surface.